Welcome to Dear PS,
This edition is guaranteed to help bring communication to the forefront of your life. Enjoy, grow and Pass It On!
Millions use or have at least heard of Global Positioning System (GPS) that helps drivers navigate through the highways and byways of life. Yes, GPS has its definite benefits but what about YCP, Your Communication Positioning? GPS may provide directions from A to B but your communication positioning is the guiding force of all your relationships – personal, social and professional. It’s time to turn on Your Communication Positioning navigation system.
All new “equipment’ comes with guidelines and a manual of operation. So what is YCP and how does it work? Every individual is consciously and/or subconsciously aware of and operating within their perceived communication position. It is the position of power and acceptance they perceive themselves to have within a communication experience or environment. Have you ever noticed that you feel and respond to people you interact with based on how you perceive yourself in connection to them? We live in a culture where we are constantly taught to compare ourselves to one another – we engage daily in social comparisons. Our self-worth or value is the measurement we consciously and subconsciously position ourselves within whenever we are engaged in communication with self and others. So, whether it is our Intrapersonal, Nonverbal, Interpersonal, Small Group, Public, Persuasive or Intercultural communication experiences, we are ALWAYS transmitting and responding within our perceived worth. How you doin’?
Your level of self-esteem and self-worth directly impact your communication effectiveness and success. As you encounter and interact within your daily communication experiences understanding the volatility of communication positioning allows the effective deliverer to communicate in greater awareness and thus greater effectiveness to achieve desired goals.
Monday, November 2, 2009
Wednesday, September 23, 2009
Dear PS writes:
The Politics of WORDS
WORDS! WORDS! And more WORDS!
Since the 2008 Presidential election, many of us have watched and listened with increasing incredulity to the vitriolic communication capturing the nation’s headlines. Much of the communication sounds and feels reminiscent of pre/post reconstruction and civil rights era rhetoric as factions divided and closed ranks around their individual interests. “Why can’t we all just get along” is still the cry of peace in 2009. I have been shocked and highly concerned about the manner in which some have decided to use their 2nd Amendment rights to vilify the current President of the United States and reconstruct change into fear, fright and the will to fight!
Maybe you missed some of the most controversial statements:
(The names have been left out to protect the not so innocent)
“President Barak HUSSEIN Obama is a racist. He hates white people.”
“You lie!”
“President Obama is a socialist, commie!”
“Yes, I meant what I said, I hope he fails!”
“Well, I think white men were 100 percent of the people that wrote the Constitution, 100 percent of the people that signed the Declaration of Independence, 100 percent of people who died at Gettysburg and Vicksburg. Probably close to 100 percent of the people who died at Normandy. This has been a country built basically by white folks in this country who are 90 percent of the entire nation-in 1960…”
Add to these words the thousands of news photos showing signs and pictures of the President with the recognizable Hitler mustache, devil horns, and a bone through his nose, as well as individuals attending his rallies toting guns…it’s a little more than out of control wouldn’t you say? And to add hurt to injury, many of these individuals purport to be devoutly religious.
WORDS! WORDS! And more WORDS!
So where are the voices of reason, sanity and civility? I have always been taught “out of the heart, the mouth speaks”. Well, my heart as well as my passion for communication that heals, tells me that I must write and speak out against this revisionist, anarchist and racist hate mongering SPEECH! It’s time to have a dialogue about the importance and effects of communication on our collective lives…one long over due in the American psyche. We are and will continue to be a nation divided by the color line until a critical number of us care more for the future of our children and our nation than we care about protecting our personal past or our particular present!
A large majority of American people elected a President of impeccable character, ability and compassion who brings with him the distinctive characteristic of being of mixed race, though having always self-identified as African American. In my lifetime, I have lived through Jim-crow (as a young child growing up in the south) and the civil rights movement. I have been labeled the “N” word, colored, Negro, black, African American and a person of color. The “labels” that have often eluded me and my ancestors have been those of: pioneer, scientist, city planner, clock maker, revolutionary, doctor, nurse, scholar, pastor, poet, abolitionist, soldier, astronomer, botanist, politician, inventor, etc., etc., etc....and all these BEFORE the end of slavery.
Fast forward 146 years later and the President of the United States is labeled an “illegal alien” by the crazed “birther movement” as well as the other dreaded “N” word - Nazi. Yes, it is enough to make you cry…and I have. I have cried for the millions of young American boys and girls who have to keep reliving a horrible past that refuses to be healed. If we do not use our voices to silence the forces of hate and fear, we are indeed conspirators to their misguided deeds! Our children deserve much better and so does the legacy of millions of Blacks, Whites, Hispanics, Asians, Native Americans and other ethnic groups who have TOGETHER built America.
In spite of the refusal of some to acknowledge the contributions of all the cultures that have made this great nation, we have: the first Hispanic Supreme Court Justice, the first Black Attorney General of the United States, the 2nd female Secretary of State, and the first African American President! There is a lot to celebrate, reflect upon and be thankful for, but let us not forget – there is work to do before we can proudly pass onto our children a nation that truly practices its declaration “We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men {people} are created equal, that they are endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable Rights, that among these are Life, Liberty and the pursuit of Happiness…” These are WORDS that act as the true moral compass of our nation. Are your words meant to heal or to kill? Are you speaking your truth? Let’s hear it; I am silent and ready to listen. There is no coincidence that both words have the exact same letters. You must be silent, inside and out, long enough to listen. Let the communication begin!
Tuesday, May 26, 2009
Bringing Communication to the forefront of Your Success!
Dear PS
...just one more thing to say.
...just one more thing to say.
PS Perkins, contributor to: Laws of Communication & WAKE UP WOMEN
Dear PS:
Q: I have a real hard time talking with people one-on-one. When at gatherings or in small groups, I am ok, but when I have to interact interpersonally, I don’t know what to say!
A: The art of conversation is an ability that escapes most people for a number of reasons. One wonderful interpersonal conversation resource is listening! You’d be surprised what you can relate to when you recognize the commonness found in most discussions. Another important guide to conversation is your repertoire. What are your interests? What do you usually talk about? Discover a little about a lot and feel more comfortable talking to anyone! Lastly, learn to value silence. You do not have to say anything unless you feel it worthwhile to all listening.
Q: I have been reading about the power of positive thinking. I am not sure if it really works but I noticed recently that I am constantly thinking negatively about everything, easily angered, and discouraged. Do my thoughts really affect my mood?
A: Your concern is very important. Many individuals are experiencing challenging times. There has been an explosion of positive thinking gurus! Their messages are nothing new. The human race has always brought forth many thought “doctors” trying to help us see the direct connection between our thoughts, words, and experiences. So YES, your thoughts definitely affect your behavior – your life. We call this Intrapersonal Communication – your self-talk. By monitoring your thoughts, which will adjust your words, you WILL change your life! It’s like the old saying – “out with the old, in with the new!”
Q: I have received a couple of complaints that I have a tendency to invade other people’s space. I do not mean to but I guess I am just not aware. I just don’t get it!
A: Each culture has its own rules governing personal and area space. You may be from a culture that looks at personal space differently. The study of Nonverbal Communication (NVC), which is culturally bound, helps us to navigate the global community we increasingly must live and work in. This “science” includes variables such as time, space, touching, smell, etc. Observe the NVC of those around you and adjust accordingly – as I always say, “when in Rome do as the Romans; when at home do as the homies!” Communication is always appropriate or inappropriate.
Q: I have a real hard time talking with people one-on-one. When at gatherings or in small groups, I am ok, but when I have to interact interpersonally, I don’t know what to say!
A: The art of conversation is an ability that escapes most people for a number of reasons. One wonderful interpersonal conversation resource is listening! You’d be surprised what you can relate to when you recognize the commonness found in most discussions. Another important guide to conversation is your repertoire. What are your interests? What do you usually talk about? Discover a little about a lot and feel more comfortable talking to anyone! Lastly, learn to value silence. You do not have to say anything unless you feel it worthwhile to all listening.
Q: I have been reading about the power of positive thinking. I am not sure if it really works but I noticed recently that I am constantly thinking negatively about everything, easily angered, and discouraged. Do my thoughts really affect my mood?
A: Your concern is very important. Many individuals are experiencing challenging times. There has been an explosion of positive thinking gurus! Their messages are nothing new. The human race has always brought forth many thought “doctors” trying to help us see the direct connection between our thoughts, words, and experiences. So YES, your thoughts definitely affect your behavior – your life. We call this Intrapersonal Communication – your self-talk. By monitoring your thoughts, which will adjust your words, you WILL change your life! It’s like the old saying – “out with the old, in with the new!”
Q: I have received a couple of complaints that I have a tendency to invade other people’s space. I do not mean to but I guess I am just not aware. I just don’t get it!
A: Each culture has its own rules governing personal and area space. You may be from a culture that looks at personal space differently. The study of Nonverbal Communication (NVC), which is culturally bound, helps us to navigate the global community we increasingly must live and work in. This “science” includes variables such as time, space, touching, smell, etc. Observe the NVC of those around you and adjust accordingly – as I always say, “when in Rome do as the Romans; when at home do as the homies!” Communication is always appropriate or inappropriate.
Thursday, November 20, 2008
“We are not the Red States and Blue States; we are the UNITED States of America!” President Elect Barack Obama
Read chapter 7, for autographed copy www.hci-global.netNovember 19, 2008
“We are not the Red States and Blue States; we are the UNITED States of America!” President Elect Barak Obama
Once again, the power of positive, clear communication inspired the hearts and minds of millions! If you can think of any single skill that most strategically helped President-Elect Obama achieve his goal as Commander and Chief of the United States of America, effective communication would have to be right up there with #1. The 2008 Presidential Election ignited conversation about the possibility of change around the world. I suggest, as we move from excited shock to the excitement of what it means to participate in change we will better understand the importance and power of Communication – the art and the science!
Isn’t It Time You Bring Communication to the Forefront of Your Life?
Dear PS: Conversations about Communication™
Welcome to the 7th and final 2008 edition of Dear PS! For the last 7 months we have taken step by step the 7 steps of the Communication Staircase empowering our communication awareness and skills. We hope you have benefited from our learned knowledge about applying effective communication tools in your life. In this edition, we are discussing the ever increasing need to be culturally competent in your communication. We now live in a global community. How prepared are you at making room for ‘others’ in your workplace or community? Make sure you read chapter 7 of The Art and Science of Communication: Tools for Effective Communication in the Workplace. Also we want to share ASC endorsement by Ken Blanchard of Ken Blanchard Companies:
“If you want to improve your relationships at work, you may need to learn how to communicate better. In The Art and Science of Communication by Pamela Perkins, you’ll learn how to express yourself more effectively and how to better understand the people around you. This interesting book is sure to perk up your people skills!”
-Ken Blanchard, coauthor of The One Minute Manager® and The One Minute Entrepreneur™
Alert, we are moving forward globally with Humanity Unites Brilliance (HUB). Visit the HUB website at http://www.elect.hubhub.com/; it’s an opportunity to work together to uplift humanity.
Thanks for a momentous year of faith, love, support, struggle and triumph! See you next year!
God bless us all!
Visit our blog for Dear PS archives and please send your comments to:
http://www.dearps.blogspot.com/
Intercultural Communication Tips
Dear PS,
Q: I am a mentor to one of the newer staff members and she happens to be Vietnamese. She always seems
so mild mannered and I keep trying to get her to speak up for herself and be more competitive.
A: This is a very typical scenario in many diverse organizations. Those that are enculturated in U.S.
American organizational cultures, are very receptive to competition and its mandates. Not all
organizational cultures thrive in competition and not everyone is interested in scaling the corporate
ladder. Some are content where they are. This is not to say that this is the circumstance of your
colleague; however, she has been nurtured in a culture that is more cooperative and has more power
distance issues. Many thrive in a different framework of promotion. (See chapter 7 ASC) First, do not
assume everyone wants the same thing. Secondly, after you have given support and gentle nudges, let it
go and she will find her comfort zone.
Q: Now that Barack Obama is President-Elect Obama, often at work I get this “obviously you voted for
Obama look”, solely predicated on race. And yes, I voted for Obama; not solely on the fact that he is half white and half black, he was the only qualified candidate in my opinion.
A: You bring up a very important issue – “your opinion”, and its other people’s opinions that have them
looking at you cock-eyed. Perspective is a very interesting thing. There is a theory called “Standpoint”
that theorizes an individual can only see from where they stand. Pretty common sense unless you
truly attempt to walk in another person’s shoes. Try not to take it personal. Change is a hard thing for
most people. Make room for other realities while honoring your own.
Q: I work with all kinds of people and feel myself to be very open as a white, heterosexual male.
However, I have a new coworker that it is a bit hard for me to develop a relationship with. She is “out”
and always talking about her “family” when we are bringing up small talk as a group. The gay thing
always seems to be in the way. I am a bit surprised by my discomfort.
A: Yes, this is obviously a preoccupation with you. I am not sure how any of us expect not to see the
opposite of ourselves all the time. Six billion people on the planet; six million variations of
everything in the flesh. Spirit is something different. Kind of puts things in perspective doesn’t
it? Move over.
PS. Have a wonderful day. It’s always your choice! And that’s my word!
Pass It On!
http://www.hci-global.com/
Wednesday, October 29, 2008
DEAR PS
September 28, 2008
Dear Human Communicators,
Isn’t It Time You Bring Communication to the Forefront of Your Life?
Dear PS: Conversations about Communication™
Welcome to the 6th edition of Dear PS! For the last 6 months we have been climbing the Communication Staircase empowering our communication awareness and skills. I hope you are finding the communication tools and advice valuable. In this edition we are discussing the power of Public Presentation – FINDING YOUR VOICE! Make sure you read chapter 5 of The Art and Science of Communication: Tools for Effective Communication in the Workplace (ASC).
Now, we have some exciting news to share with you! Several months ago we came in contact with an organization called Humanity Unites Brilliance (HUB). We joined because we needed to consolidate and increase our charitable contribution impact as well as take advantage of the incredible personal growth offerings of HUB. As a secondary incentive, we understood that we could share HUB with others and profit from its multi-level marketing model. But honestly, we were so excited to be contributing to HUB sponsored programs like Feed the Children, Nobel Prize winner Dr. Yunus’s Micro-loan Programs, Clean water projects and building schools, we really did not seriously consider the economic benefits to our business. Well, the economic reality of our world is changing the way all of us must look at our resources AND ways to participate in healing the planet. HUB is it! Not only do we have our own HUB portal to advertise our business and products to millions; not only are we wisely providing for the needs of those less fortunate; not only are we being mentored by some of the greatest business and motivational minds IN THE WORLD, we now realize that we really can make money to grow our dreams. It’s true; we’ve experienced it and seen it first hand. Interested, visit the HUB website at http://www.elect.hubhub.com/; it’s time for a new paradigm. When we work together to uplift humanity, we uplift ourselves. Join us!
Visit our blog for Dear PS archives and please send your comments to:
http://www.dearps.blogspot.com/
Public Presentation Communication Tips
Dear PS,
Q: I freeze up when I have to speak “off the cuff”. I get so self-conscious and my words just don’t come
out the way I want.
A: You are not alone. Most individuals find impromptu communication uncomfortable. A couple of
suggestions: (1) increase your repertoire of global awareness, you can not contribute if your
knowledge base only contains your personal likes/dislikes; (2) improve your vocabulary; (3) be ready –
if there is even the remote possibility that you may need, want to contribute, plan ahead, and lastly (4)
be interested in others and LISTEN – this technique can give you lots to contribute by just asking
questions based on what others are interested in. These are just a few techniques. ASC chapter 5
offers many more ways to find your voice when you want it!
Q: I often have to give presentations for my firm and even though I enjoy speaking in front of
groups, I find that I struggle with self consciousness and as a result have trouble getting my message
across.
A: You have heard that Public Speaking is the number one fear for most people. You at least will move
through the fear and come forward to speak your “truth”. I suggest two ways for controlling
nervousness when speaking in public: (1) preparation and (2) message consciousness. Preparation
creates confidence; message-consciousness maintains composure. You need a healthy dose of number 2
- keep your mind on your message and off your self!
Q: I listen to people like Tony Robbins, Oprah Winfrey and other great communicators. Their voices
sound so professional, so interesting. I think mine is flat and boring. Can I change this?
A: You sure can! Your Paralanguage (see chapter 2 ASC) is the tonal quality and other nuances that
make your voice unique. Fortunately, your vocalics can be altered if you so desire. Some take
accent/dialect reduction classes, which I do not advocate except in extreme cases. Some individuals just
need to raise or lower their speech, maybe talk slower or faster, or focus on their diction. There are
many ways we can “clean up” our voices to be more interesting, vibrant and clear to our listeners. At
HCI, LLC we provide these services individually and for groups. Call for your free consultation today!
PS. Have a wonderful day. It’s always your choice! And that’s my word!
Pass It On!
http://www.hci-global.net/ http://www.hci-global.com/ http://www.communicationstaircase.com/
Dear Human Communicators,
Isn’t It Time You Bring Communication to the Forefront of Your Life?
Dear PS: Conversations about Communication™
Welcome to the 6th edition of Dear PS! For the last 6 months we have been climbing the Communication Staircase empowering our communication awareness and skills. I hope you are finding the communication tools and advice valuable. In this edition we are discussing the power of Public Presentation – FINDING YOUR VOICE! Make sure you read chapter 5 of The Art and Science of Communication: Tools for Effective Communication in the Workplace (ASC).
Now, we have some exciting news to share with you! Several months ago we came in contact with an organization called Humanity Unites Brilliance (HUB). We joined because we needed to consolidate and increase our charitable contribution impact as well as take advantage of the incredible personal growth offerings of HUB. As a secondary incentive, we understood that we could share HUB with others and profit from its multi-level marketing model. But honestly, we were so excited to be contributing to HUB sponsored programs like Feed the Children, Nobel Prize winner Dr. Yunus’s Micro-loan Programs, Clean water projects and building schools, we really did not seriously consider the economic benefits to our business. Well, the economic reality of our world is changing the way all of us must look at our resources AND ways to participate in healing the planet. HUB is it! Not only do we have our own HUB portal to advertise our business and products to millions; not only are we wisely providing for the needs of those less fortunate; not only are we being mentored by some of the greatest business and motivational minds IN THE WORLD, we now realize that we really can make money to grow our dreams. It’s true; we’ve experienced it and seen it first hand. Interested, visit the HUB website at http://www.elect.hubhub.com/; it’s time for a new paradigm. When we work together to uplift humanity, we uplift ourselves. Join us!
Visit our blog for Dear PS archives and please send your comments to:
http://www.dearps.blogspot.com/
Public Presentation Communication Tips
Dear PS,
Q: I freeze up when I have to speak “off the cuff”. I get so self-conscious and my words just don’t come
out the way I want.
A: You are not alone. Most individuals find impromptu communication uncomfortable. A couple of
suggestions: (1) increase your repertoire of global awareness, you can not contribute if your
knowledge base only contains your personal likes/dislikes; (2) improve your vocabulary; (3) be ready –
if there is even the remote possibility that you may need, want to contribute, plan ahead, and lastly (4)
be interested in others and LISTEN – this technique can give you lots to contribute by just asking
questions based on what others are interested in. These are just a few techniques. ASC chapter 5
offers many more ways to find your voice when you want it!
Q: I often have to give presentations for my firm and even though I enjoy speaking in front of
groups, I find that I struggle with self consciousness and as a result have trouble getting my message
across.
A: You have heard that Public Speaking is the number one fear for most people. You at least will move
through the fear and come forward to speak your “truth”. I suggest two ways for controlling
nervousness when speaking in public: (1) preparation and (2) message consciousness. Preparation
creates confidence; message-consciousness maintains composure. You need a healthy dose of number 2
- keep your mind on your message and off your self!
Q: I listen to people like Tony Robbins, Oprah Winfrey and other great communicators. Their voices
sound so professional, so interesting. I think mine is flat and boring. Can I change this?
A: You sure can! Your Paralanguage (see chapter 2 ASC) is the tonal quality and other nuances that
make your voice unique. Fortunately, your vocalics can be altered if you so desire. Some take
accent/dialect reduction classes, which I do not advocate except in extreme cases. Some individuals just
need to raise or lower their speech, maybe talk slower or faster, or focus on their diction. There are
many ways we can “clean up” our voices to be more interesting, vibrant and clear to our listeners. At
HCI, LLC we provide these services individually and for groups. Call for your free consultation today!
PS. Have a wonderful day. It’s always your choice! And that’s my word!
Pass It On!
http://www.hci-global.net/ http://www.hci-global.com/ http://www.communicationstaircase.com/
Tuesday, September 2, 2008
Isn’t It Time You Bring Communication to the Forefront of Your Life?
August 24, 2008
Dear Human Communicators,
How successful would you be personally and professionally if you had a personal Communication Advisor?
Isn’t It Time You Bring Communication to the Forefront of Your Life?
Dear PS: Conversations about Communication™
Welcome to the 5th edition of Dear PS! For the last 5 months we have been climbing the Communication Staircase empowering our communication awareness and skills. I hope you are finding the communication tools and advice valuable. In this edition we are discussing the power of persuasion in relationship to the pervasive messages of mass media confronting all of us daily. There are only 3 ways to persuade and 3 reasons for doing it. Make sure you read chapter 6 of The Art and Science of Communication: Tools for Effective Communication in the Workplace (ASC).
The Human Communication Institute, LLC just returned from an incredibly successful Warm Spirit® Conference in New Orleans and a series of book signings. We are pleased and proud to say “PEOPLE ARE GETTING IT!” They are receiving the empowering tool of the Communication Staircase Model and personal, social and professional lives are positively changing! As our “Dear PS” family, we truly hope yours is too! And as always, we sincerely appreciate your support and PASSING US ON!
Visit our blog for Dear PS archives and please send your comments to:
www.dearps.blogspot.com
Mass/Persuasive Communication Tips
Dear PS,
Q: Can you help me understand why I seem to be receptive to other people ideas at work and so lacking in
confidence about my own? I seem to trust and listen to others more than I do myself!
A: You appear to be an individual that is highly influenced by “speaker credibility” or ethos. In other
words, during your years of socialization, other people’s opinions, attitudes, and beliefs took
precedence over your own. This inclination has transferred into your professional life. Take some time
to think about why other people’s opinions are more valuable than your own. When did it begin? What
experiences made you devalue your ideas as less than others? Come to understand that you do have
a unique contribution to make to both your personal and professional settings. Find your voice and
trust it. Yes, we should seek the advice and opinions of those we trust and admire but your destiny can
only be forged by trusting yourself with the answers for your future as well as the talents you bring to
the workplace.
Q: I am a having trouble getting my message across to my co-workers. We are having problems meeting
deadlines and as their supervisor I just can’t seem to motivate them to action!
A: Your concern is not uncommon to others in leadership positions. Our last communiqué discussed team
building and tips for effective teams. We define a successful team as one that thrives in co-opetition,
“members contributing their individual best for the collective good.” This is the vital key to motivating
your team - making sure that you are valuing each member for their individual contributions and sharing
the vision of the collective reward. Motivation is not a hard sale. It is encouraging individuals to
continue to do what they already know will benefit them. Work on the communication climate and make
sure you are communicating success and mutual advantage. Read the Mass/Persuasion chapter in ASC.
It provides great tools for influencing your audience.
Q: There are so many different choices in life? I am having trouble navigating through all the different
voices. How can I find my own path?
A: This is the question all of us must ask we seek to understand our unique contribution to the vast universe
of creation. Be careful of the “mass” voices that daily make their way into your consciousness. “Be this,
do that, have this, want that!” Determine where these voices are coming from and what are they asking
of you. Are they driving you towards your individual best or are they asking you to subjugate your
desires to their own? Discover your passion and live in it. Invite only those voices, those choices that
support your dream and add your wonderful contribution to this wonderful creation!
PS. Have a wonderful day. It’s always your choice! And that’s my word!
Pass It On!
www.hci-global.net www.hci-global.com www.communicationstaircase.com
Dear Human Communicators,
How successful would you be personally and professionally if you had a personal Communication Advisor?
Isn’t It Time You Bring Communication to the Forefront of Your Life?
Dear PS: Conversations about Communication™
Welcome to the 5th edition of Dear PS! For the last 5 months we have been climbing the Communication Staircase empowering our communication awareness and skills. I hope you are finding the communication tools and advice valuable. In this edition we are discussing the power of persuasion in relationship to the pervasive messages of mass media confronting all of us daily. There are only 3 ways to persuade and 3 reasons for doing it. Make sure you read chapter 6 of The Art and Science of Communication: Tools for Effective Communication in the Workplace (ASC).
The Human Communication Institute, LLC just returned from an incredibly successful Warm Spirit® Conference in New Orleans and a series of book signings. We are pleased and proud to say “PEOPLE ARE GETTING IT!” They are receiving the empowering tool of the Communication Staircase Model and personal, social and professional lives are positively changing! As our “Dear PS” family, we truly hope yours is too! And as always, we sincerely appreciate your support and PASSING US ON!
Visit our blog for Dear PS archives and please send your comments to:
www.dearps.blogspot.com
Mass/Persuasive Communication Tips
Dear PS,
Q: Can you help me understand why I seem to be receptive to other people ideas at work and so lacking in
confidence about my own? I seem to trust and listen to others more than I do myself!
A: You appear to be an individual that is highly influenced by “speaker credibility” or ethos. In other
words, during your years of socialization, other people’s opinions, attitudes, and beliefs took
precedence over your own. This inclination has transferred into your professional life. Take some time
to think about why other people’s opinions are more valuable than your own. When did it begin? What
experiences made you devalue your ideas as less than others? Come to understand that you do have
a unique contribution to make to both your personal and professional settings. Find your voice and
trust it. Yes, we should seek the advice and opinions of those we trust and admire but your destiny can
only be forged by trusting yourself with the answers for your future as well as the talents you bring to
the workplace.
Q: I am a having trouble getting my message across to my co-workers. We are having problems meeting
deadlines and as their supervisor I just can’t seem to motivate them to action!
A: Your concern is not uncommon to others in leadership positions. Our last communiqué discussed team
building and tips for effective teams. We define a successful team as one that thrives in co-opetition,
“members contributing their individual best for the collective good.” This is the vital key to motivating
your team - making sure that you are valuing each member for their individual contributions and sharing
the vision of the collective reward. Motivation is not a hard sale. It is encouraging individuals to
continue to do what they already know will benefit them. Work on the communication climate and make
sure you are communicating success and mutual advantage. Read the Mass/Persuasion chapter in ASC.
It provides great tools for influencing your audience.
Q: There are so many different choices in life? I am having trouble navigating through all the different
voices. How can I find my own path?
A: This is the question all of us must ask we seek to understand our unique contribution to the vast universe
of creation. Be careful of the “mass” voices that daily make their way into your consciousness. “Be this,
do that, have this, want that!” Determine where these voices are coming from and what are they asking
of you. Are they driving you towards your individual best or are they asking you to subjugate your
desires to their own? Discover your passion and live in it. Invite only those voices, those choices that
support your dream and add your wonderful contribution to this wonderful creation!
PS. Have a wonderful day. It’s always your choice! And that’s my word!
Pass It On!
www.hci-global.net www.hci-global.com www.communicationstaircase.com
Saturday, August 23, 2008
Dear PS
Dear Human Communicators,
Welcome to our new “Dear PS Blog”. Send Your Comments!!!
How successful would you be personally and professionally if you had a personal Communication Advisor?
Dear PS: Conversations about Communication™
What a difference a few weeks makes! Since our last communiqué, we now have a democratic frontrunner for President of the United States of America that is also breaking historical barriers by being a Bi-racial (Black) American male! Hillary Clinton waged the most successful female candidacy ever! We are also dealing with the devastating fall-out of the Mississippi River floods! There are again peace talks between Hamas and Israel! The EU has decided to lift sanctions from Cuba! What a few incredible weeks...Think about it. All that we know and understand about the aforementioned situations is what has been shared, created or experienced through the POWER of WORD. What is your word creating? If you are reading this newsletter, your continued communication will be enriched. Share with others! That’s what Interpersonal Communication is all about – sharing with another in connectivity.
I am so excited to share as author that The Art and Science of Communication (ASC) is flying off the shelves of major bookstores nationally, international and online into the hands and mind of a multitude of interested readers! THANK YOU to all who have purchased copies and are already reading and sharing. I just returned from a Barnes and Noble 3-stop book tour in my home state N.C. It was FABULOUS! I am receiving some extremely positive and humbling feedback. I recently walked into a Borders Bookstore, and there was my book on the Business/Communication shelf! How exciting for me to sign a few copies for the store. We are in desperate need to understand more about this gift and the VITAL important power of communication skills to navigate every aspect of our lives. Please continue to join me and PASS IT ON!
LASTLY, Read The Art and Science of Communication, and PLEASE visit Amazon.com to share your review of the book with the world.
Interpersonal Communication Tips
Dear PS,
Q: One of my colleagues has a huge problem with listening! I can not get a word in. They always seem to know the answer to everything, right or wrong. How can I encourage him to listen?
A: You use the right phrase –“encourage to LISTEN.” Many people confuse hearing with listening. The deaf listen, they do not hear. Every time we engage in listening, we make a choice to do so. We hear involuntarily but we listen voluntarily. Share with your colleague that listening entails using 4 basic ingredients – the eyes, ears, mind and memory. All 4 need to work together synergistically to experience active listening. Encourage the department to sponsor classes in basic communication skills. Chapter two of ASC provides effective listening tools.
Q: I am having a really difficult time communicating with my spouse. It feels that we don’t have anything positive to share any more. It’s all about bills and problems at work. It’s as if when we talk, we no longer share the little things or our dreams and goals. I don’t know what to do.
A: The two of you have forgotten how to listen with empathy. There are only 4 types of listening experiences you vacillate between all day long. Empathy is one of them. To listen with empathy means to listen with your mind AND heart. Just because you care! Just because you value the other person’s opinions and dreams as much as your own. When you lose this vital ability within the interpersonal relationship, you are quickly on your way to termination. You both are encouraged to take the Listening
Self-Evaluation assessment in Chapter 2 of ASC and carefully examine the listening tips given. Also, it helps to make sure you really understand how important you are to one another.
Q: I understand how Intrapersonal Communication may affect my personal life but I do not understand its connection to my relationships.
A: You take you wherever you go! When you interact with others, you interact from the level of YOUR thoughts, YOUR feelings. All of these are a part of your Interpersonal Communication. Your relationships are built on how you see yourself, how you feel about yourself. If you are angry in your life, you will experience angry relationships. If you are content with you and your life, you will attract other contented relationships. We call these “mirror messages” – the reflection we get from others about ourselves. Your relationships are a reflection of how you see yourself always, and will change when you change – for better or for worse!
PS. Have a wonderful day. It’s always your choice!
And that’s my word!
Pass It On!
http://www.hci-global.net/ http://www.hci-global.com/ http://www.communicationstaircase.com/
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Dear PS: Conversations about Communication™
What a difference a few weeks makes! Since our last communiqué, we now have a democratic frontrunner for President of the United States of America that is also breaking historical barriers by being a Bi-racial (Black) American male! Hillary Clinton waged the most successful female candidacy ever! We are also dealing with the devastating fall-out of the Mississippi River floods! There are again peace talks between Hamas and Israel! The EU has decided to lift sanctions from Cuba! What a few incredible weeks...Think about it. All that we know and understand about the aforementioned situations is what has been shared, created or experienced through the POWER of WORD. What is your word creating? If you are reading this newsletter, your continued communication will be enriched. Share with others! That’s what Interpersonal Communication is all about – sharing with another in connectivity.
I am so excited to share as author that The Art and Science of Communication (ASC) is flying off the shelves of major bookstores nationally, international and online into the hands and mind of a multitude of interested readers! THANK YOU to all who have purchased copies and are already reading and sharing. I just returned from a Barnes and Noble 3-stop book tour in my home state N.C. It was FABULOUS! I am receiving some extremely positive and humbling feedback. I recently walked into a Borders Bookstore, and there was my book on the Business/Communication shelf! How exciting for me to sign a few copies for the store. We are in desperate need to understand more about this gift and the VITAL important power of communication skills to navigate every aspect of our lives. Please continue to join me and PASS IT ON!
LASTLY, Read The Art and Science of Communication, and PLEASE visit Amazon.com to share your review of the book with the world.
Interpersonal Communication Tips
Dear PS,
Q: One of my colleagues has a huge problem with listening! I can not get a word in. They always seem to know the answer to everything, right or wrong. How can I encourage him to listen?
A: You use the right phrase –“encourage to LISTEN.” Many people confuse hearing with listening. The deaf listen, they do not hear. Every time we engage in listening, we make a choice to do so. We hear involuntarily but we listen voluntarily. Share with your colleague that listening entails using 4 basic ingredients – the eyes, ears, mind and memory. All 4 need to work together synergistically to experience active listening. Encourage the department to sponsor classes in basic communication skills. Chapter two of ASC provides effective listening tools.
Q: I am having a really difficult time communicating with my spouse. It feels that we don’t have anything positive to share any more. It’s all about bills and problems at work. It’s as if when we talk, we no longer share the little things or our dreams and goals. I don’t know what to do.
A: The two of you have forgotten how to listen with empathy. There are only 4 types of listening experiences you vacillate between all day long. Empathy is one of them. To listen with empathy means to listen with your mind AND heart. Just because you care! Just because you value the other person’s opinions and dreams as much as your own. When you lose this vital ability within the interpersonal relationship, you are quickly on your way to termination. You both are encouraged to take the Listening
Self-Evaluation assessment in Chapter 2 of ASC and carefully examine the listening tips given. Also, it helps to make sure you really understand how important you are to one another.
Q: I understand how Intrapersonal Communication may affect my personal life but I do not understand its connection to my relationships.
A: You take you wherever you go! When you interact with others, you interact from the level of YOUR thoughts, YOUR feelings. All of these are a part of your Interpersonal Communication. Your relationships are built on how you see yourself, how you feel about yourself. If you are angry in your life, you will experience angry relationships. If you are content with you and your life, you will attract other contented relationships. We call these “mirror messages” – the reflection we get from others about ourselves. Your relationships are a reflection of how you see yourself always, and will change when you change – for better or for worse!
PS. Have a wonderful day. It’s always your choice!
And that’s my word!
Pass It On!
http://www.hci-global.net/ http://www.hci-global.com/ http://www.communicationstaircase.com/
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